Tag: fears

The Elephant in the Room

The Elephant in the Room

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The Reality of Phantom Pain

 

 

It’s real!

It does exist, and it can come out of nowhere and attack you when you least expect it. Phantom pain is an equal opportunity offender with no regard for who it targets.

Phantom sensation is similar but constant. It’s not about the excruciating pain it inflicts, like phantom PAIN, as much as it’s the never ending, always present tingling, buzzing, and throbbing of the missing body part, (in my case, my lower left leg and foot).

No matter what’s going on, how active I am or am not, or even the weather, phantom sensations are always burning in my foot. At first I didn’t think I was going to be able to take it but I can tell you two certainities:

  1. After suffering phantom PAIN, I will gladly take the sensations!
  2. I find that these sensations are a gift in that they help me to find my footing as I walk because my foot feels like it’s there at all times.

 

Just a reminder, all journeys are NOT the same. my pain tolerance might be higher than yours or your phantom pain might last longer and be more intense than mine, we are all different and how we handle them is also going to be different.

Some people choose to medicate to help with the pain, others use mirror therapy or a neurotransmitter.

Others may choose to use tap therapy, or heat/cold therapy to lessen the intensity.

 

I have a neurotransmitter implanted in my back, but it created more pain than it stopped so I have turned mine off, for now.

I also have chosen to stay far away from medication so I know the true feelings of my pain and learn to deal with them naturally as they come. I spent too many years on drugs to help with all the surgeries and couldn’t wait to get off of them, permanently!

 

Like I said, everyone is different. what works for me may or may not work for you. Only you can decide how to attack these phantom issues. It’s always good to talk with other amputees to see how they are dealing with their pain and what works for them but remember what works for them may not work for you.

I say this so you don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t work. You will need to keep searching and trying out new ways to handle your pain based on you. And sometimes something will work one time but not the next time it occurs. Talk about frustrating!!

Phantom pain is for real! It’s vicious, distracting, and debilitating! It can and will try to consume you, and break you, just remember you are strong! You are a warrior!

 

 

This is a tough one.

You will need to get creative and dig down deep!

This is where TRUE warriors are made.

Don’t sit and dwell on the pain, it will consume you and make it harder to bounce back from it.

Find somethings that work for you (I use distraction when I am in a bad pain place-walking, driving in my car, playing music, watching a movie, reading, moving some more, getting to the gym, etc) This keeps my mind active, and distracted. Don’t sit around thinking about it, it’ll only amplify the pain, trust me, I know!

Once you find things you are capable of doing, use these techniques to help you on the rough days. You will find that you will handle the phantom pains better if you have resources ready to be utilized.

And don’t forget to communicate with your family, friends, your support system. Even best laid plans get wrecked, and if you are screaming on the inside, more than likely you’ll start screaming on the outside and the people who you love the most will be casualties to it. Let them know that you are struggling. Phantom pain is invisible to everyone outside of us, they can’t know what we are going through so we must be open and honest, for the sake of relationships.

You’ve got this and you are NOT alone.

Rise up, Precious Warrior, Rise up! Fight your battles with confidence and with the assurance that this too shall pass.

 

As always and until next week,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never Ending Challenges

Never Ending Challenges

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When You Least Expect It

Just when you think you are in the clear. Or when you feel like you got it all together….Wham!!!

Yep, life sends you into a new challenge.

I am 4 1/2 years out from my amputation and into my 15th socket I go. However, even though it should have been a simple change as it was just a remake of the socket I was in (the plastic was giving away but still fit) we encountered complications.

Nothing major, but my valve wasn’t working properly for a couple of weeks, which meant I couldn’t wear it, and then once that got fixed the end of my residual limb seemed to be moving too much down inside of the socket, which was creating swelling, which in turn made it worse.

It was a snowball effect. One issue, led to another issue, which led to another issue.

Simple fix. Hmmm.

Ever have that happen to you?

How did you handle it?

What I can tell you is that after 4 years of wearing a prosthetic, I have become more attuned to my body and what feels right, and what I can and cannot handle. These are minor issues, indeed, but if you don’t have the experience (which only comes with time and observations as an amputee) then you may be prone to freaking out about the fit and worried that these issues could get worse and create bigger issues.

I remember the first time my residual limb swelled. I didn’t know what was happening, why it felt weird and hard, and freaked out that I was getting an infection. After all, I had heard of amputees getting infections years after their surgery! YIKES!!

Now that I understand what is happening with my limb, I know how to combat it and when to call my prosthetist for help and adjustments.

 

 

Experience is key, but I share this with you so you understand what can happen, even years later. That you need to build up your patience and knowledge so you can handle these odd moments, because they don’t just stop after the first year.

 

Don’t give up hope.

Try not to get frustrated, and make sure you make time to stop and breathe deeply.

Smile. It helps with your emotional state in the midst of problems, and don’t let fear strike you down. I understand that each new issue is delving into the unknown, but you will survive, and you will rise up again, and again, and again.

 

Remember, you are a Warrior!

Now go out and seize the day!

You are special, unique, and there is only one YOU in this whole, wide world!

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

 

 

Reality Check

Reality Check

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Are you seeing amputees doing all the things you could only dream of doing? Thinking you are so far behind that you could never get there? Or see them doing amazing things, “pain-free”?
Well, in the spirit of complete transparency, and shedding light of the realities of being an amputee, I have had a hard couple of days.
Yep! Even 4 1/2 years out. Do they happen often, no, but phantom pains, poor fitting socket days and just plain “off” days can come out of nowhere and hit me like a freight train!
This weekend was no exception.
I has been out hiking, doing what I love, and even though it was a tough hike I got through unscathed…. However, the next day, I’m sure my muscles were so taxed that my phantom pain came back in sharp stabbing droves, meant to take me out in mere moments!
The reality check is, we all have our journey, whether you’re an amputee or not. You cannot compare yourself to anyone else, because there is no one like, who went through what you went through, and can handle it like you. Our pain tolerances are different, our illness that led to our condition are difference, our age, activity level and our gender are all different.
Most people think that going through amputation is the hard part, but in reality, it’s the first 1-2 years after, in which you have to get fitted for a socket, place something heavy and cumbersome on your body, and relearn to walk all over again. The fit takes patience and time to adjust, you fall, you get rashes, you break down and get frustrated.  And when you finally get everything to feel “good” you have atrophy and drop weight and your limb changes and you start the whole process ALL OVER AGAIN!!! Sometimes even just 1-2 months after you finally get a good fit!
So whether you are struggling on the path you are on in life, or finding it debilitating to keep moving forward as an amputee, know that this is all part of the journey. You have to experience the ups and downs to learn and become stronger, physically, mentally and emotionally. I can tell you all that I’ve gone through but to truly learn from it and appreciate it, you must go through it yourself. And your journey won’t look like mine or anyone else’s, your journey is YOUR journey. Embrace it and enjoy it for all its worth. You’ll be amazed at the person you’ll become as you wrestle with the challenges you’ll go through.
This week, listen to yourself. Know when you need a break and take it. Spend time reflecting on what’s got you blocked or bound up and know that this isn’t the end, just a hiccup.
Take a deep breathe, and rise up again and give another crack at it.
Baby steps, little by little, keep you moving forward.
Don’t give up and believe in yourself!!
And as always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
A Season and A Reason

A Season and A Reason

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Navigating Friendships Through Life’s Trials

Friends come and go in our lives. Sometimes it’s because of geographical change, and sometimes we outgrow each other. Other times we part ways because there is a fall out, or even a misunderstanding that goes unattended and left to grow. On the flip side, as our stages in life change so do the people who come into it, and a new friendship blossoms in an unlikely moment.

If you have been dealing with a difficult time in your life, you will notice one of two things might happen.

One, certain people will rally around you to assist and be there for you. They check in often, organize other helpers, and even come to help you pass the time. They bend over backwards to make sure you are taken care of, and love doing this for you and your family.

Two, some people will disappear when you need them most. This is heartbreaking because what you thought was a great, solid, and caring friendship is destroyed in the blink of an eye. When the going gets tough…they get going!

 

Now, based on these two descriptions we also need to see OUR side of the relationship. Let’s call this self-reflection time.

How are you projecting your situation out into the world? Who is getting sideswiped by your frustrations, “Debbie Downer” moments, and your wrath?

You see, it takes two. And of course, we know it’s hard to deal with something big that goes wrong in our life. I understand this. I spent 5 years in and out of surgeries, only to come to the realization that amputation was the only way out. I’m sure that I had some “moments” that weren’t so sweet and joyful. However, what was my body language saying? What words and type of tones were coming out of my mouth? Who got hit with the anger, frustration, and disappointment I was feeling in the worst moments on my journey?

Do you see what I’m saying here?

Sometimes we need to correct ourselves, for the sake of the relationship. We need to remember that everyone goes through hard times, unexpected illnesses, and redirections in their journeys. What we can’t do is succumb to the negative emotions at the risk of losing beautiful people in our lives. Negativity kills friendships. Negativity kills relationships. Negativity will keep you down and devour you from the inside out.

Friendships are two-way streets, and we just need to take a look in the mirror to see if what we are putting out in the universe is helpful in growing, and nurturing the relationships we have, or are we using our circumstance to separate us from those that we are closest.

Good friends want to watch you rise up and succeed. Does your personality during crisis mode invite them in to your life or scream at them to get out?

 

 

Take stock in your relationships.

This week make a list of the friends who have entered your life and those who are on their way out.

Next, decide which ones are worth saving and which ones are toxic to your recovery and happiness.

It’s time:

Reach out and love on the friends who mean something to you. Give them a reason to call you friend. We must learn to reciprocate the attention and support.

Cut ties with those who are bad for you. The ones who’d rather see you down and out, the ones who don’t believe in you and have let you down time and time again.

Use this next week to take stock in the true friendships in your life and, if need be, what it’s going to take on your part to nurture them.

 

You’ve got this,

And don’t forget that it’s ok to let go of those who are bad for you. Maybe they were a positive in your life PRIOR to what you’re going through, but they have changed since then. This is tour life, and you deserve to be happy.

 

Best wishes on clearing up your life and the poeple in it.

And as always, until next time,

Be healthy,

Be happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

Spring Cleaning

Spring Cleaning

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Cleaning Out Your Mind and Heart to Have a Body Worth Living In

 

 

The sun is shining, and the days are growing longer, it must be spring!

That also means it’s time for Spring cleaning…. no not of your home, but of your mind and heart.

If you’ve been feeling down, and unproductive, or frustrated and frazzled, then it’s probably time to clean out your thoughts and your emotions. Yep, you can do Spring cleaning on yourself.

Too many times we get caught in a hard time and we feel derailed, alone, frustrated, useless, sad, etc., etc. But these hard moments, or circumstances that you have no control over don’t have to be a negative. We can use these times of trial to hone in our skills of being positive, building character and resilience.

However, if we are not careful, we can become our own worst enemy and sabotage our lives, with negativity and worry.

When we take stock of our thoughts and feelings and throw out the negativity, we are clearing out that space for better things.

I challenge you to create a better headspace for you, change your thinking and self-talk, and get yourself moving in the right direction. Your body will thank you!

 

Find your inner positivity and SMILE!!

 

Create a list of the positive and negatives on your heart right now.

Create a 2nd list of the positive and negatives on your mind.

Now go through and figure out what you need to do to eliminate the things that are taking you on a negative path.

Example might be that you are frustrated or embarrassed by your body image. Ask yourself what you can do to change that, it may be taking a walk outside every night, or getting back in he gym, or trying a virtual race, it may also include kicking the late night binge eating you’ve been doing.

Once you’ve gone through all of your negatives, figure out how to make adjustments to your thinking, your habits, and self-talk then create goals for yourself (like walking everyday to change the negative mindset you have about your image).

Use the month of May to kickstart a new healthier, happier you!

Figure out the problem(s).

Make a list.

Create solutions.

Set goals.

Crush goals!

 

Remember that you are amazing, and awesome!

You deserve the very best of you, so don’t settle for anything less.

 

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bouncing Back with Mike Coots

Bouncing Back with Mike Coots

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Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 46:59 — 31.4MB)

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Shark Attack Survivor to Shark Advocate: A True Bounce Back Story

Pictures in the Deep

 

Facing the creature who turned his life upside down… head on and with love and respect. Truly inspiring!

 

This is one story of bouncing back that has always stood out to me. Since I first met Mike, on Kauai, to our first interview in 2021, and watching his path widen, deepen, and become more powerful and enlightening, I have been in awe of his love for the one thing that did him harm. And quite frankly, that speaks volumes to me… not just about Mike, but about sharks! If someone is a victim of a shark attack and literally turns around to advocate for them and their rightful place as the apex predator of the ocean, AND portrays them as beautiful, and graceful creatures to be saved and admired, then I need to listen up and educate myself past the fears that have been instilled in me by Hollywood since I was a child.

This is Mike’s mission through his photographs and advocacy stance in DC.

Forgiveness was given, and a new path is being forged between the victim and the perpetrator.

This is the true meaning of healing on the inside.

When Mike was just 18 years old, with dreams of becoming a professional surfer, this nightmare couldn’t have been farther from his mind. Yet, with support from his family and community he took a huge setback and created a new life for himself.  He studied, met people, watched for doors to open, and went with the flow of his new path, which all led him to forgiveness, empathy, love, and partnership with the one thing that almost took his life.

Mike and the Tiger Shark

 

His setback became the set up for the life he lives now, and the life he adores.

When he was asked if he would change the day of his attack, to keep his legs and become that professional surfer, do you know what he said?

 

 

Back at it!

 

Listen in to hear his answer.

Listen in to hear what happened that fateful day, and to hear what new adventures he is on.

Thank you, Mike, for your time and telling your story, and for being the voice of a misunderstood creature in our oceans.

Mahalo!

 

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

 

 

Bouncing Back With Maja and Rosie

Bouncing Back With Maja and Rosie

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A Bright Soul and A Sweet Pup

 

War torn and separated from family, Maja’s story is a great comeback story and includes a sweet Great Dane, Rosie, who is also an amputee.

It looks to be a story of who saved who, and you’d be correct in assuming that.

As you listen in this week, you’ll hear a story that begins with tragedy, suffering, separation, uncertainty, and fear. However as we delve deeper into Maja’s life we will see a strong woman who has found a way to bounce back and make a new life for herself, in a new country, and with a new friend.

 

 

 

In war torn Bosnian, Maja grew up. A teenager who snuck out one evening, with friends, she found herself outside of her home when a bomb blew up right in her neighborhood and Maja lost all 5 of her friends in that moment, along with being severely injured herself.

One moment she is bleeding out being taken to a makeshift hospital, undergoing amputation- without anesthesia, the next she finds herself getting an opportunity to be taken to the US with a kind lady wanting to make a difference in a child’s life…. and Maja took it, leaving her family behind and traveling to a country where she knew no one and didn’t know the language.

Fast forward 15 years and night terrors and PTSD set in, enter Rosie, a Great Dane pup who lost her leg and in need of a good home.

This is a comeback story for the ages. A must listen and one to help you rise up and conquer your own situation.

When things happen to us, we have a decision to make: are we the victim or the hero of our story? We get to decide that for ourselves.

When you feel like you have had a setback in your life, realize that this setback is setting you up for a comeback. When we change our thinking we can change the outcome.

Thank you, Maja, for spending time with us, telling your story and being a positive light in this world. Your ability to see the positive and let go of the past is remarkable and a beacon of hope for all who hear your story. May you continue to find peace and healing everyday.

 

 

 

Bouncing Back with Coach Dar

Bouncing Back with Coach Dar

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We all have roadblocks and circumstances that come out of nowhere and try to derail our lives.

These moments, or set backs, can do one of two things to us:

They can disable us, or they can challenge us to grow.

Set backs can become set ups for the next big thing in your life!

Are you feeling stuck, frustrated, alone, or defeated? Today I am excited for you all to join in my interview with Coach Dar, a  world renowned mental skills coach for many professional athletes and Fortune 100 companies, helping them to awaken greatness within and change their perspective so they can get out of their own way.

Coach Dar has also just published her first book titled, “The Art of Bouncing Back”, a great metaphor for life, right?

She speaks from a place of experience as she delves into the setbacks she’s had in her own life.  These “moments” could have easily destroyed the person she is, but instead they have set her up and placed her where she was meant to be, helping thousands of people, of all walks of life, achieve greatness despite their situations.  Through the tools she speaks of in her book and with us today, you too can unleash greatness and live your best life.

It’s time for you to Bounce Back!

Coach Dar and yours truly

 

If you are struggling right now, wondering if you’ll ever be able to bounce back, Coach Dar and I talk about the basic things you need to start doing right NOW, to change your mindset, and gain mental fortitude so you can move forward, and become a stronger you!

Get started today, change your thinking, practice positive affirmations, and watch yourself become the best version of you, living the life you want to live.

 

Thank you, Dar, for being a guest on my show. It was a real pleasure, and I am grateful to you for sharing your own personal journey so others can learn from you.

 

You can get Coach Dar’s book, here, or wherever books are sold.

 

I hope you all have an amazing week, and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

Rise Up!

Rise Up!

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My bouncy running blade

 

 

You can do it! It’s time to bounce back!
April is Limb Loss/Limb Difference Awareness month and I have a packed line up of some incredible people for you to hear from, feel motivated by, and relate to!!
Next week I am starting off this amazing event with someone who has just published her first book, who hasn’t lost a limb but was dealt a rough hand, which has led her to rise up and carve out an amazing life for herself, helping other people reach their full potential.
Coach Dar, who has worked with many professional athletes, the corporate world, and now is even speaking with youth who have experienced Limb Loss just published “The Art of Bouncing Back”!
Bouncing back is April’s theme on my podcast, because we’ve ALL been some place that we’ve had to make the decision to give up or bounce back, right?
Join me next week to hear Coach Dar’s amazing story and some tips and techniques from her on how we can all rise up to our full potential no matter our circumstance.
Don’t miss this event and April’s line up!!
Make sure you subscribe so you don’t miss an episode!!
Rise up, Warriors, rise up!
Grab your copy of Coach Dar’s new book, “The Art of Bouncing Back”, read it, take notes, and then tune in next week to hear from Coach Dar, herself.
You’ll be glad you did!
Until next week and as always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
The Struggle is Real

The Struggle is Real

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The Leg is Fake

 

“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.”

-Allen Klein

If I didn’t laugh I would cry… Oh wait, I did cry!

Yep, it was that kind of week for me. It happens, and I wanted you to hear what it’s like for me when I fall on hard times, because it does happen.

I began doing some treadmill work last week and believe I hit a nerve in my residual limb, making it angry. Then 2 days later I pinched a nerve in my back and off we went! Serious pain shooting down my legs, creating massive phantom pains in my residual limb and beyond.

To top this fun adventure off I was also having to fast all day Sunday and then most of Monday for a health exam that I wasn’t excited about. Between nerve pain, pinched nerve, fasting, and anxiety about an appointment, it was the perfect storm and an epic test of my mental fortitude.

As I sat around hurting beyond belief, I was thinking of all the things I talk about on my podcast and how to cope with hard times. It was then that I realized that I needed to practice what I preach. I had to dig down real deep to find the strength, the pain was so intense, and I was also sleep deprived, did I mention that? I couldn’t just sit and let it get to me, and I couldn’t take it out on the ones I love and who have supported me on this journey, so I needed to practice positivity, embracing the moment for what it was, remember that it won’t last forever, and breath.

It wasn’t easy. I had to keep starting over and re-adjust my thinking. I failed time and time again to, mentally, get past the pain. I had to remember everything I’ve been speaking about and be honest about where I was at. …

I was in a valley!

I went from the peak of a mountain top just 7 days ago, and within a blink of an eye, I was in the depths of the valley, looking for a way out. THIS was the place I had spoken about, the place I had told you happens to each of us, and it came out of nowhere and without warning.

The positive side, you ask? There’s only one way from here, and that’s up!

I am ready, I want to be on the top of the mountain, I have a new appreciation for the joys of mountain tops and a deep desire to be there again. That is my goal! It will always be my goal.

Mountain tops and valleys

 

 

This week I want you to practice breathing to gain composure when you’re hurting.

Use a Body-Scan to assess each of your body parts, find where your pain is coming from, acknowledge it and then move on from it. If the pain draws you back to that area, revisit, acknowledge again, and move on. Do not give that area any power over your focus and time during this scan.

Finally, communicate with the people around you when you fall into that valley. Keep them informed of what you are dealing with and what you need… maybe even apologize, in advance, for not being you.

You are a warrior!

You are perfect the way you are, and strong enough to get through this.

Speak positive, and know that you are capable, loved, and enough!

 

As always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie

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