Tag: character

How Did I Get Here?

How Did I Get Here?

Faith and Connections

 

Just the other day I met a lovely woman in a wheelchair. My first instinct was to smile  but then I looked down, only to see that this kindly older lady was missing part of her limb. She was a below knee amputee.

She was being pushed around the store by a younger man, a caretaker, in her wheelchair when she noticed me and my prosthesis.  She asked him to back up and push her towards me to talk about being an amputee.

Her smile showed she was a fighter. She also informed me it has been 2 years since her amputation,  and now she was dealing with cancer. But still she smiled!

I knew that she was someone I wanted to know.

We talked for a bit, I told her we’d love to have her on our women’s chat groups and I made sure she had my name written down before we parted ways. She was struggling with the phantom pains, something I know all too much about. We had that in common and our connection was amazing and immediate.

Before I chose amputation I had been fighting through ten surgeries in 5 years, plus a blood clot, before deciding on amputation.

I had 4 months to wait from the time I scheduled my amputation til the surgery, and in those 4 months I went thru every emotion know to humans. I was a wreck trying to navigate something so surreal and on my own.

That is, until I leaned into my Christian faith. I had met a nice pastor during my time in PT, as he was getting his shoulder injury worked on by my PT on many of the days I was there. We talked, I reflected, then on my birthday (which feel during my wait time) I decided to re-baptize myself at this pastor’s church, which I started going to on Saturday evenings, just a month before. I needed to find connections, I need to find God in all of this mess I called my life.

 

The love of a puppy

 

The love from my horse

 

The love of my family

 

 

What I found, while attending the Saturday evening services, was amazing people who understood and stood with me during this time.

I sat down, on campus, with this pastor and we talked about life in general. Afterwards, when I got back to my car I had a life-altering epiphany, this whole thing, this journey I was on, was God’s plan for me. I now, looking back, could see his fingerprints on it all!

I felt such a burden lifted from me at that point, and I can honestly say, I have never looked back.

I am embracing every high and low for what it’s worth, and I know it is for my own good and all these moments were meant to build me up for something else. My mindset got positive. My view of my future became positive and my fears were muted.

When I connected with this lady the other day, I saw God working again, reminding me why He chose me for this journey. I connected in a way that helped and brought joy to this new friend of mine, and I walked away feeling joyful and fulfilled once again.

Connections; we, as humans, were created for connecting with one another and with the world around us. This gives us hope and joy, it fills us with purpose and passion for our life we are living, despite the circumstances.

 

 

 

This week I want you to give it a try.

If you have been staying at home, or are stuck at home find a way to get out.

If you can’t get out then find another way to connect with people. Find a virtual chat room, like the one I have each Wednesday, or call a friend or family member. Reach outside of your own life and find out about someone else’s.

When we connect either physically or verbally with someone else we gain perspective and can step back from what is disabling us.

It’s never going to be a good outcome if you are at home only thinking about your own problems and issues. That is isolating and can destroy you, mentally and physically.  You need to branch out and see that you are not alone in suffering or struggles, we all have them, day to day and even from hour to hour.

Staying secluded isn’t helpful and is hard to lift yourself out of, we aren’t meant to go it alone. Humans were built for connection.

This week make some real connections with others and watch your perspective change and watch your struggles lessen, even if only for those moments you are with someone.

Listen to someone and what they are going through. No need to give advice, sometimes we just need to feel heard.

And remember, everyone is going through something, and each moment is meant to build you up and strengthen you for what’s to come.

Are you preparing for your future successes?

Are you strengthening your resolve and character?

You were built with a warrior inside of you, we each were. It’s time to let that warrior out and fight for the life you want, the life you crave. Don’t allow yourself to be fooled that it won’t get better, your mindset matters, and you WILL find the strength needed to achieve your goals.

You are a Warrior! Believe it!

Have a blessed week ahead, and until next time,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

Much love,

 

 

Independence

Independence

Freedom and Joy in Movement

 

What do you dream about doing or accomplishing?

As amputees we tend to struggle with getting back out there, worried that we won’t be able to live full lives filled with goals set and conquered, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth!

Yes, the first couple of years there is a lot of changes taking place with your body, and a whole new routine of being fitted for your prosthesis every few months, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be getting active and finding the joy of becoming independent once again.

Prior to my amputation I spent 5 years in surgeries, icing and elevating my leg, and going to appointments. I had no time to do anything else, and my life became a series of tasks in hopes of getting better, but not truly living. I had no time to dream about the next ski trip or learning a new sport, I was in survival mode, plain and simple.

However, I set many goals for myself to accomplish by one year post-amputation. I never thought, “What if I can’t do this?” or “That’s not possible.” I just set my goals and worked toward them. No one told me that maybe I was being to aggressive on myself, or that I was dreaming too big. My family and friends just walked alongside of me, supporting me through it all.

What I can tell you about that first year is this: I was so happy! I found joy in life once again! I never looked back with regrets to having had the amputation, and in that first year I knew that I could do anything I put my mind to.

 

Life is meant to be lived fully. I aim to try new things whenever the opportunity arises!

 

The point: We each are traveling on our own unique journey, but we all want to have independence and the feeling of freedom that comes with that, this truly goes for those of us who have been laid up, or stuck in a medical crisis. Setting goals to keep us on track and moving forward is key to feeling the freedom of independence once again.

When I speak to other amputees about what they want to get back to doing to make them feel productive, and independent in life, some of the most basic life skills is what they speak of first; dressing themselves, standing in their kitchen to wash dishes or make a meal. Basic, right? But that’s what makes us feel productive and useful. I know I couldn’t wait to show my family that I could serve them the way I use to, before the accident. And when we experience these baby steps of accomplishment it leaves us thirsting for more!

The goals and aspirations grow and change. As we build strength and stamina, as we get better at using our prosthesis, we begin to really dream of the possibilities. That’s when the real fun begins, and the joy from accomplishing goals becomes a need not just a want.

So, What do you dream about accomplishing? What will give you back your independence or freedom?

Dare to dream because being an amputee isn’t what it use to be. You can do anything you put your mind to, if only you dare!

 

This week I want you to make a list of the things you most want to do. Maybe tasks around the house or at work. Maybe just getting dressed or making the bed. It doesn’t have to be big, monumental tasks or goals, just ones that will make you feel good that you can do on your own again.

It is also ok to add, to your list, goals for the future. Remember, dreaming is what keeps us motivated and moving forward.

Don’t be afraid to add whatever is on your heart. This is a great time to not think about the “how” of these longterm goals, just dream!

Finding independence again, is such a blessing and brings great joy.

Just remember to START WHERE YOU’RE AT.

Know that with these new goals there may be some fear or anxiety, but with anything worth achieving we must all face fears. I do all the time. Just remember what you’re made of. Remember what you’ve been through. YOU ARE A WARRIOR!!

Now make that list and start tackling those dreams!

 

I hope you all have a blessed week, thank you for listening,

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

Much love,

 

Bunker Hill- 297 steps to the top! I was nervous but I did it!
I See You

I See You

Setbacks Happen, You Are Not Alone

 

The reality is that after your amputation the journey is just beginning.

The journey is filled with ups and downs and everything in between.

I wished I could tell you that once your limb physically heals, from the surgery, that it’s all downhill from there but that wouldn’t be accurate for 99% of the amputees.

Most of us will deal with 2-3 years of limb volume changes making the socket fitting process a true test of patience and resilience.

Add in phantom pains, possible neuromas, skin breakdown, etc and the challenges can seem daunting and never-ending

But have no fear, the journey is not an easy one, but can be so very rewarding.

You should be setting goals for yourself, depending where you are in your journey.

This life is a journey; embrace it, wherever you are at in it.

 

You will build character and learn so much about yourself, too.

I know you are going through some rough times right now, but you’re not alone. I see you. I have been where you are, and I will probably have a rough go at it sometime in the near future.

This is the life of an amputee.

There is beauty in the struggle, though. Your mindset can dictate, and WILL dictate your outcomes.

You have two choices, play the victim or play the hero of your story.

Your mindset matters.

If you are in the middle of a setback in your journey, have no fear. This is the moment to take a breathe, be present, and begin to anticipate what beauty is to come.

What do you want to achieve?

Where do you see yourself once you heal or get past this hurdle?

 

At this moment, when life seems too much and you are frustrated and feeling like you’ll never get back to the way you were before your setback remember that this moment is setting you up for a leap forward and in the right direction.

Get your mindset correct and be ready for the positive changes.

Use this time to create a plan that makes you happy, one that you can be excited about as you anticipate your full recovery, from whatever is holding back right now.

If you visualize a positive momentum to come, you can will it to happen.

Sending your mind positive thoughts and imagery is exactly how to succeed.

Pause in this moment, take a few deep cleansing breathes and prepare yourself for a positive shift.

You’ve got this, Warrior!!! Don’t lose hope.

 

I’m praying for you!

 

Until next time and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

 

 

 

 

“Normal”

“Normal”

Don’t Be Normal, Just Be YOU!

 

A word I try very hard to stay away from using in dialogue is “Normal”, as in, “Is it normal that I haven’t healed yet?” or “Is it normal to feel this way?”, or even “Does my limb look normal to you?”

 

The reason I stay away from it is because we are all so very different that there cannot be a NORMAL, or Norm.

We all heal differently, we feel pain differently, we became amputees because of different reasons.

We are different sexes, ages, fitness levels, etc, etc, etc.

I say just be YOU!

Learn what your new “normal” is, and how that changes day to day or even hour to hour as an amputee. Only you can decide what doesn’t look or feel right for you and your circumstance. And when in doubt, don’t ask Social media, call your doctor or medical professional.

 

 

 

 

This week practice keeping “normal” out of your conversations and just listen and tune into your own body.

Accept that you are uniquely and wonderfully made and there is only one you and YOU are normal, for you!

Have a blessed couple of weeks as I will be off next week doing family time.

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

Much love,

 

 

 

Insurance Games

Insurance Games

Playing To Win; Playing For Your Future

 

Dealing with insurance can be tricky and often frustrating. I speak from experience.

It’s unfortunate that insurance companies make it so hard to understand the ins and outs of their policies as well as getting approvals especially since those who are trying to get covered are often going through really tough emotional times.

As I got myself prepared for my amputation I was doing everything to prepare myself, mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially seeing as this would be a forever life changing surgery.

My experience was not smooth, nor was it kind, but I figured out how to handle my situation, found my voice, and fought for what was right and what I needed.

Join me this week as I take you on my journey with the games that insurance companies play, and how you can play and beat them at their own game.

 

This is what I fought to get……

 

So I can do this….

 

…And this

 

….And this

 

…And this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What are you fighting for? And if you’re not fighting for what you want, then who will???

 

Randy and David at The Limb Center and also Limbs For Humanity

 

 

This week, if you are in the middle of a big decision that takes medical insurance, make sure you do your homework and get confirmation about what is covered.

If you have been told “No” by your insurance company then it’s time to fight for what you want and need.

We must fight for ourselves, because only we know exactly what we need and want to make our lives worth living.

Help yourself by fighting for your future. Don’t give up, and don’t take “No” for an answer!

You are a warrior and you are WORTH IT!!

 

Have a blessed week and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

 

 

Finding Success Through Trials

Finding Success Through Trials

Mindset Matters

 

So you’re an amputee now. You’ve gotten through your surgery, and you’re home. Now what?

The road is long, my friend, but doable.

You can and will survive, dare I say, you can even thrive as an amputee.

How you see your circumstance and adapt to your new way of living is up to you and based on your own mindset.

After I elected to amputate my leg, above knee, after 5 years of surgeries and a blood clot, I had no idea what I was in for, but what I did know was that I was strong, stubborn, and going to hold myself accountable to my own success (seeing as I chose this path). This is my journey and I was going to own it- the good, the bad, and the ugly of it all.

Mindset matters!

If you tell yourself you will succeed, chances are, you will.

If you tell yourself you can accomplish your goals, chances are, you will.

This is no different. Positive self-talk, self-love, and positive mindset will all come to your rescue on those hard days.

Yes, there will be hard days, weeks, and even months as you adjust to your new way of getting around. It’s ok to have those emotionally bad days, just don’t allow yourself to linger there. As you heal, then start the fitting process of your prosthesis, you’re going to realize that the tough days are just beginning, but I know you can handle it. Why? Because you are a warrior and capable of great things!

I would tell you that I am successful at being an amputee, and living my best life. How do I gauge that? By the goals I have set for myself, achieved, and by the fact that I don’t see myself as handicapped or incapable, anymore.

 

 

This mindset takes time, and is refined through trials. It doesn’t happen overnight so don’t get frustrated if you don’t feel this way…yet.

Stick with positivity. Keep pushing yourself toward your goals. Never give up and one day you’ll realize that you have gotten to a place where you have found joy, happiness and peace with where you are at, and living a great life. Being an amputee isn’t the end of the world, nor the end of a healthy, happy life. On the contrary, you will find your new journey very rewarding once you grasp what makes it tick.

Find Your Rainbow

 

Nothing worth achieving happens quickly, remember that. We must fight the battles, learn to pick ourselves up, and to try, try again. These moments that try to take us down are the precise moments we need to experience so we can become stronger and learn how to manage them in the future.

 

I’d say that 75% of my Call to Actions revolve around goal setting, and this one is no different.

You must find it in your to dream and write down the things you hope to accomplish as an amputee.

Don’t limit yourself, just write!

List as many things as you can that you’d love to accomplish.

At first they may be as simple as wearing your prosthesis a little longer each day, or not taking it off when you get fatigued. Then you’ll start dreaming of taking walks again with your dog or family.

Mine got as big as learning to surf for the first time ever. HEY, why not??? right?!?!

Write them all down, now figure out what is attainable at the stage you are at and set that as priority number 1. Create steps to that goal, how will you achieve it. and then get after it!

Don’t wait until Monday, or after this holiday nor that holiday, START TODAY!! Today is as good a day as any. and the sooner you start the sooner you’ll achieve your goals.

 

You are a warrior and capable of more than you may believe. You are resilient and an overcomer!

Best wishes on your goal setting!

And until next week, as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

 

 

 

Overcoming Fear Part 2

Overcoming Fear Part 2

Fear of Failure

 

A big fear of mine has always been failing, especially in front of a lot of people. How about you?

After becoming an amputee this became the daily fear that would well up inside of me. Every day I put on my leg I had to deal with idea that, as I was learning to walk in it, I just my wipe out.  Then after I got good at walking, I added in the fear of falling with a running blade on, which would make for a more epic fall.

It feels like the normal, everyday, things were now causing my anxiety.

I realized right away that I would have 2 choices:

Stay home, pout, and not get out and work on my new life

or

Get out, try everything, fail, pick myself back up and try again.

On the edge of the Grand Canyon!

 

Me and my bees

 

My new Swell Surf foot, ready for the waves of Kauai

 

My 1st time wadding in a rushing stream, keeping balance, and trying fly fishing! A whole lotta new!

 

As you probably guessed, I opted for the second choice! Get out and LIVE!

This took time, patience, humility, and drive.

It wasn’t easy going into a grocery store with a new leg, knowing people were watching, almost waiting for me to stumble. At least that’s how it felt at first. But I had a family to feed and a husband at work all day. I was not going to be a burden and I was going to learn this new lifestyle, no matter what it took.

As a teacher, I told my students all the time that it’s ok to fail. That’s the only way to learn. It was time for me to take my own advice.

It’s a long road, a hard journey, when learning to walk again. It’s difficult to take an old. easy, everyday task, and start over.

Have grace and forgiveness with yourself. Be patient, like you’d be with your own kids learning something new.

What advice would you give your baby who was just learning to walk? Would you be mad at them for trying their first steps and falling over? Of course not, so why would you be mad, upset, impatient with yourself?

Why is it that we are so hard on ourselves, yet so forgiving with others that we seeing trying and failing?

Remember, it is more rewarding to try, try, try again and get something, than to just be able to do something simple that you get on your first try.

When you are forced to subject yourself to uncertainty, and yet certain failures at first, you are building your experience, you are building your character, and you are building a warrior mentality.  These are the characteristics that will help you succeed at your next task.

Don’t be afraid to get out there and try something new. You never know what will come of your efforts. What I have learned is that with every trial, I became stronger, met new people, inspired others, and found a deep joy for my new life that I wouldn’t change for the world!

 

Deep inside of you lies a warrior waiting to be unleashed! You’ve got this. Face your fears head on and watch how you will transform your life!!!

You are a warrior!!

 

 

This week begin to change your mindset. Speak positively to yourself and then think of 1 thing you have been wanting to do but have been too afraid to try it.

Now make a plan on how to get from point A to point B. Remember to break it down into baby steps. You cvan do this. I believe in you!

Work at it every day, even for 5-10 minutes. Realize that learning to do something new takes failure. Embrace the failures. Even laugh at yourself from time to time. We all fail at first.

Pick yourself back up and start again!

Don’t give up!

You’ve got this!!

 

Until next time,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

Challenge Accepted

Challenge Accepted

Finding Your Path Through the Challenges

Do you have a challenging road ahead?
Do you struggle with fears of what’s to come and if you are strong enough to manage your circumstance?
We all face challenges, every day, yet some are so huge we struggle to see past them. We may cave to fear and shrink back from the challenge that lies in front of us.
Through my personal journey with 5 years of surgery, recovery and setbacks, only to be followed up with a blood clot and elected amputation I give you a snapshot into what my life has been like, the hard times, the fears, and what it looks like facing challenges head on and coming out the other side.
I had 2 extremely profound experiences following amputation that gave me peace, joy, and hope that everything would be alright and that my new “normal” was going to be an epic ride!
A horse who saw me for where I was

Feeling the mana, power, of the waves and the stoke of rising up!
Rise to challenges!
If you fall, dust yourself off and rise again!
When you face fears and challenges in life, the outcome can be transformational, and will help build up your character!
Never give up! Continue to fight for the life you want! You can do anything, if you’re willing to give it your all.
This week pick something that you find challenging in your life that you have been wanting to address, attack, and conquer. Now get after it!
It doesn’t have to be a huge, enormous issue, just one thing that maybe you’ve been afraid to face or fear you might fail at. If you have been house-ridden and really want to try getting outside for fresh air and steps, start small. What is it that you ned to accomplish first? A child doesn’t learn to run before it can walk, nor can you expect to walk a mile when you haven’t been to the end of your block. Baby steps will help you chunk your bigger goal into more manageable, small goals. These baby steps may be small, but they are leading you in the right direction- FORWARD!  Take your challenge head on, chip away at it, pick yourself up when you fall, and continue to make strides forward toward your goal. You’ll be glad you did!
Be strong! Rise to the challenges! Press through fear and watch your life become a masterpiece!
#abovekneeamputee #ampstrong #podcast #bawarrior360 #empowerment #challenges #riseup #mission22 #characterbuilding
Dare to Dream

Dare to Dream

You are Special and Deserve It!

 

What do you do when you’re struggling? Maybe you are like me and lost a limb. Maybe you have a plethora of other medical issues and have been wheelchair bound. Or maybe you just can’t get out of your own way and headspace.
Is this you?
I know you want more from life.
You may have even questioned, “Is this all there is for me?”
Don’t give up!
Dream!
Chase answers!
Seek help!
I struggled for 5 years and went through 10 surgeries, only to be left with a leg that only had 20° range of motion and wouldn’t straighten. I could barely move around my home, let alone ski with my family, hike, take the dogs for a walk, or ride a bike.  All dreams that I knew were fading away! Talk about depressing and defeating.
A blood clot was my wake up call and the metaphorical nail. I talked, researched, visited doctors, asked opinions, even spoke with other amputees to make up my mind.
Dare to dream!
Don’t give up!
Join me today to hear how this journey is going and at the end of my podcast listen for my Call to Action for YOU! Let’s do this together!!
Make a list of the dreams you have. List everything that you would love to do, see, experience, try.
Dream big! Don’t be afraid. Spend some quiet time thinking and dreaming. Write them all down.
Now place them in an order that builds upon each other. Maybe some are more accomplishable now and work to build upon the next and so on.
Finally, ask yourself what you need to do to accomplish goal 1, goal 2, etc. Pursue those goals by working through what’s stopping you.  I understand that some may seem really far off based on medical situations. If your goal is to run a 10K and you’re in a new socket then plan to start small. Maybe it’s getting it on and wearing it around your house for a few hours, then for the day around your house. Work toward walking all day in it, out and about. Then work toward walking to the mailbox every day. The next thing you know you’ll be out walking a mile, then 2.
Take your big dreams and break them into small goals to achieve them. Only you know what it will take to get yourself there. For me it was scheduling my amputation, then dealing with that loss, then healing and getting a prosthetic. Finally I registered to run a 10K a year out and worked on strengthening and learning to walk again. Baby steps. I may not have run the whole race but I DID finish!! Then I moved on to my next goal. I had them all mapped out in my head and on my vision board in my bedroom (see the podcast on making a vision board back in season 1) I highly suggest a vision board to help you visualize your dreams and goals!!
Spend the next 7 days dreaming and writing them down.
If you need to talk through your plan please feel free to reach out to me on IG; @BAWarrior360 or Facebook: BAWarrior360
I’d be happy to help in any way I can.
Until next week and as always:
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!
You are a Warrior!
Much love,
Angie
What Motivates You?

What Motivates You?

What gets you moving in the morning? What lights a fire under you? What keeps you moving forward when you feel like giving up?

Our mindset and goal setting allows us to find success. They give us the direction and purpose we need to press forward and reach levels of success that might not have been possible otherwise.

I make sure that I have a clear image in my head of what the next day will look like, before I go to bed. I have a to-do list of things I need to do and another list of things I WANT to do. Make sure you mix it up otherwise you could face some burn out and then lose momentum. My dad always said I needed to work hard, then I could play hard; do things I must do and then enjoy the things I want to do.

 

Finding time to go to the gym is my play time, but somedays it’s just hard to motivate myself to go.
But I always feel good after I’m done.

 

You can find success each day if you know where you want to go. Like going on a trip, you plan out your travels so you get to where you want to go and so you know when you’ll arrive. Same goes for being motivated.  If you plan for success, you’ll most often succeed. If you fail to plan then you will fail.

 

This week I want you to try this night time ritual;

Either in your mind or on paper think of all that you want and need to accomplish tomorrow. Understand your timeline, meaning when you will need to get up in the morning and when you’ll want to go to bed, and then factor in each item you’ve listed. I have found that I now clump certain items together, for example, if I need to go see my prosthetist that is south 45 minutes, I also try to hit any stores down that way to be time efficient, that also feels like a victory. I also work backwards in thinking about my day. This gives me the opportunity to get up at the right time in the morning so I ultimately have the right amount of time to accomplish everything.

Now set that alarm and get some rest.

What if you wake up in a blah mood, a negative space? Now you build character by pushing forward at what you set out to do the night before. This won’t be easy but I promise you it’ll feel great when you accomplish what you set out to do, despite the vibe of your day.

Use music to help motivate you and keep you moving forward. And make sure you check out Fearless Motivation on Apple Music!

I wish you a week filled with smashed goals and positive vibes!

Stay motivated, my friends!

 

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

much love,

Angie