Reality Check
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Friends come and go in our lives. Sometimes it’s because of geographical change, and sometimes we outgrow each other. Other times we part ways because there is a fall out, or even a misunderstanding that goes unattended and left to grow. On the flip side, as our stages in life change so do the people who come into it, and a new friendship blossoms in an unlikely moment.
If you have been dealing with a difficult time in your life, you will notice one of two things might happen.
One, certain people will rally around you to assist and be there for you. They check in often, organize other helpers, and even come to help you pass the time. They bend over backwards to make sure you are taken care of, and love doing this for you and your family.
Two, some people will disappear when you need them most. This is heartbreaking because what you thought was a great, solid, and caring friendship is destroyed in the blink of an eye. When the going gets tough…they get going!
Now, based on these two descriptions we also need to see OUR side of the relationship. Let’s call this self-reflection time.
How are you projecting your situation out into the world? Who is getting sideswiped by your frustrations, “Debbie Downer” moments, and your wrath?
You see, it takes two. And of course, we know it’s hard to deal with something big that goes wrong in our life. I understand this. I spent 5 years in and out of surgeries, only to come to the realization that amputation was the only way out. I’m sure that I had some “moments” that weren’t so sweet and joyful. However, what was my body language saying? What words and type of tones were coming out of my mouth? Who got hit with the anger, frustration, and disappointment I was feeling in the worst moments on my journey?
Do you see what I’m saying here?
Sometimes we need to correct ourselves, for the sake of the relationship. We need to remember that everyone goes through hard times, unexpected illnesses, and redirections in their journeys. What we can’t do is succumb to the negative emotions at the risk of losing beautiful people in our lives. Negativity kills friendships. Negativity kills relationships. Negativity will keep you down and devour you from the inside out.
Friendships are two-way streets, and we just need to take a look in the mirror to see if what we are putting out in the universe is helpful in growing, and nurturing the relationships we have, or are we using our circumstance to separate us from those that we are closest.
Take stock in your relationships.
This week make a list of the friends who have entered your life and those who are on their way out.
Next, decide which ones are worth saving and which ones are toxic to your recovery and happiness.
It’s time:
Reach out and love on the friends who mean something to you. Give them a reason to call you friend. We must learn to reciprocate the attention and support.
Cut ties with those who are bad for you. The ones who’d rather see you down and out, the ones who don’t believe in you and have let you down time and time again.
Use this next week to take stock in the true friendships in your life and, if need be, what it’s going to take on your part to nurture them.
You’ve got this,
And don’t forget that it’s ok to let go of those who are bad for you. Maybe they were a positive in your life PRIOR to what you’re going through, but they have changed since then. This is tour life, and you deserve to be happy.
Best wishes on clearing up your life and the poeple in it.
And as always, until next time,
Be healthy,
Be happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
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The sun is shining, and the days are growing longer, it must be spring!
That also means it’s time for Spring cleaning…. no not of your home, but of your mind and heart.
If you’ve been feeling down, and unproductive, or frustrated and frazzled, then it’s probably time to clean out your thoughts and your emotions. Yep, you can do Spring cleaning on yourself.
Too many times we get caught in a hard time and we feel derailed, alone, frustrated, useless, sad, etc., etc. But these hard moments, or circumstances that you have no control over don’t have to be a negative. We can use these times of trial to hone in our skills of being positive, building character and resilience.
However, if we are not careful, we can become our own worst enemy and sabotage our lives, with negativity and worry.
When we take stock of our thoughts and feelings and throw out the negativity, we are clearing out that space for better things.
I challenge you to create a better headspace for you, change your thinking and self-talk, and get yourself moving in the right direction. Your body will thank you!
Create a list of the positive and negatives on your heart right now.
Create a 2nd list of the positive and negatives on your mind.
Now go through and figure out what you need to do to eliminate the things that are taking you on a negative path.
Example might be that you are frustrated or embarrassed by your body image. Ask yourself what you can do to change that, it may be taking a walk outside every night, or getting back in he gym, or trying a virtual race, it may also include kicking the late night binge eating you’ve been doing.
Once you’ve gone through all of your negatives, figure out how to make adjustments to your thinking, your habits, and self-talk then create goals for yourself (like walking everyday to change the negative mindset you have about your image).
Use the month of May to kickstart a new healthier, happier you!
Figure out the problem(s).
Make a list.
Create solutions.
Set goals.
Crush goals!
Remember that you are amazing, and awesome!
You deserve the very best of you, so don’t settle for anything less.
And as always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
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Meet my prosthetists and friends, Randy West and David Banks (left and right in blue). We met and began discussing my future as an amputee months before my surgery. During that time, I told them of my past activity levels, my current life as a wife and homeschool mom, and my dreams and aspirations for my future. They used that information to fit me and help me realize my dreams. They listened to me when I had questions and struggles, they made changes to my fit when I needed it and directed me to great medical doctors when I needed more than a great fitting socket.
They have done so much for me and given with their hearts.
David, as you can see in the 1st picture above, is an above knee amputee himself, and like all amputees, when it happened he had to adjust and change direction in his life, which brought he and Randy together. David tells his story in this podcast, and I will tell you that his story makes a full circle, which is kind of amazing!
Now after 20+ years of friendship they are beginning their road of a non-profit called, Limbs For Humanity. They go to Mexico every month and see as many amputees as possible in a weekend, bringing parts and prosthetics to these people, people who never even dared to dream about one day walking again. They give of themselves, and their time, heart, money, and talents for the sake of bringing mobility to people who never thought that was possible….and it has been life-changing (and not just for the clients, for David and Randy, too).
This story of David’s tragic amputation as a young man, and now as a company who gives of themselves for a greater cause is what Bouncing Back is all about!
They have taken setbacks and used them as set ups for the greater good.
Come along today and be inspired by David’s story, find hope that a prosthetist can truly care about your well-being (because they do exist!), and find purpose in your life, because when one window shuts you must look for another window to open, and what’s on the other side could be life altering!
I haven’t done any CTA this month as we are talking with people about their journeys and how they bounced back to get where they are, but I feel this episode is a great one to put one out there.
This week, go follow my friend’s non-profit @limbsforhumanity on Instagram
And give!
If you have spare prosthetic parts around your house, touch base with me or them and we can donate to people who need them. Donating money is another way to help a non-profit get off the ground running. Money helps them get the parts they are lacking, among other things to help these guys get to Mexico to give new life to so many people.
Randy, David, I appreciate you!
Thank you for being exactly what I needed when I wasn’t even sure what I needed and allowing me to fly!!
Please help them and donate today! God bless!
And as always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
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April is Limb Loss/Limb Difference Month and I am excited to share with you several guest speakers throughout the month and into May, however, we had a major setback yesterday and will have to reschedule them for another week.
Turning my setback into a setup, I spent most of last night frustrated and upset that my plans, well-thought out but still botched, coming up with what I feel is a super start to this special month.
Our support groups, people, family, friends, and companion animals!
Yep, let’s turn the tables and give thanks to those who were by our side, through thick and thin, through the good times, and the bad. Those that helped us laugh when we wanted to cry and held our hands when we were afraid.
Who was there to support you?
Who stood on the sidelines and cheered you on?
Who protected you?
Who visited when you felt alone?
These are the people (and maybe animals) who deserve our utmost gratitude and love. They saw us at our worst and lifted us up so we could shine.
Today I am grateful for the medical staff who helped me through, for my family back home, for the friends who checked in on me and brought my family dinners, and to my husband and 2 boys who were my biggest fans, strongest supporters, carrying me through hard times and bad news, to making me laugh until I cried. I wouldn’t be where I am today without all of you! I am forever grateful for every note, call, meal, smile, appointment, taxi service, adjustment, joke, and hug you all supplied me with to get me through.
YOU are my heroes!
And there are so many more family and friends who were there for me. Thank you, thank you all, from the bottom of my heart!
This week, use the next 7 days until pour next episode to reach out and give a heartfelt thank you to those who have been there for YOU! Trust me, you will make their day and your bucket will be overflowing knowing that you made a difference in their lives as well.
Everyone wants to be appreciated for the moments they helped out someone they care about.
When we show that sort of appreciate, after the fact, shows them that we saw them and their kindness.
Now who couldn’t use a little more of that in their life?
As always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!!
Much love,
Angie
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“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.”
-Allen Klein
If I didn’t laugh I would cry… Oh wait, I did cry!
Yep, it was that kind of week for me. It happens, and I wanted you to hear what it’s like for me when I fall on hard times, because it does happen.
I began doing some treadmill work last week and believe I hit a nerve in my residual limb, making it angry. Then 2 days later I pinched a nerve in my back and off we went! Serious pain shooting down my legs, creating massive phantom pains in my residual limb and beyond.
To top this fun adventure off I was also having to fast all day Sunday and then most of Monday for a health exam that I wasn’t excited about. Between nerve pain, pinched nerve, fasting, and anxiety about an appointment, it was the perfect storm and an epic test of my mental fortitude.
As I sat around hurting beyond belief, I was thinking of all the things I talk about on my podcast and how to cope with hard times. It was then that I realized that I needed to practice what I preach. I had to dig down real deep to find the strength, the pain was so intense, and I was also sleep deprived, did I mention that? I couldn’t just sit and let it get to me, and I couldn’t take it out on the ones I love and who have supported me on this journey, so I needed to practice positivity, embracing the moment for what it was, remember that it won’t last forever, and breath.
It wasn’t easy. I had to keep starting over and re-adjust my thinking. I failed time and time again to, mentally, get past the pain. I had to remember everything I’ve been speaking about and be honest about where I was at. …
I was in a valley!
I went from the peak of a mountain top just 7 days ago, and within a blink of an eye, I was in the depths of the valley, looking for a way out. THIS was the place I had spoken about, the place I had told you happens to each of us, and it came out of nowhere and without warning.
The positive side, you ask? There’s only one way from here, and that’s up!
I am ready, I want to be on the top of the mountain, I have a new appreciation for the joys of mountain tops and a deep desire to be there again. That is my goal! It will always be my goal.
This week I want you to practice breathing to gain composure when you’re hurting.
Use a Body-Scan to assess each of your body parts, find where your pain is coming from, acknowledge it and then move on from it. If the pain draws you back to that area, revisit, acknowledge again, and move on. Do not give that area any power over your focus and time during this scan.
Finally, communicate with the people around you when you fall into that valley. Keep them informed of what you are dealing with and what you need… maybe even apologize, in advance, for not being you.
You are a warrior!
You are perfect the way you are, and strong enough to get through this.
Speak positive, and know that you are capable, loved, and enough!
As always,
Be Healthy,
Be Happy,
Be YOU!!
Much love,
Angie
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