Tag: attitude

Changes and Challenges

Changes and Challenges

New Socket and What To Expect

 

 

Here we go again!

Last week I told you all about a huge blister that formed in my socket on the end of my residual limb, well, after talking to my prosthetist about that and a few other things that I was ignoring, he decided that it was time to make a new socket!

 

UGH!!

 

Where great sockets are made!!

 

Randy West and I getting ready to make a mess!

 

Cast is made!

 

 

I know what you’re thinking. “That’s great! You’ll have a better fit than what you have now”, and that is true, however, the idea of going through the casting and fitting process, then a week of walking around in a hard plastic shell test socket isn’t fun and then after it’s all created there is a “breaking in”period that can last up to another week. All the while you are hoping that the changes move you in the right direction.

 

My current socket being used to remake the original mold

 

 

All in all, it will be better (or at least that is the hope). My guys do an amazing job of getting me the best fit, they are incredible at what they do, and I am blessed to have them in my corner. It’s just that it is such a long and, at times, painful process that brings discomfort before it brings joy.

So I am going this week to be recast and will create a video of the process for you to see.

I bring this up for a couple of reasons.

  1. This is my life, and my podcast is about my personal journey,  that I can speak to.
  2. It’s important to note that even though I’m through the harder years of fitting my prosthesis, there will still be changes that happen down the road, and being an amputee has ever-changing challenges and struggles.

I’m excited, for sure, to get a new fitting socket and the idea of recreating my external design has me giddy. I love remaking my look.

But I am a realist as well, and I know what I am about to embark on is a process that takes time, perseverance, and grit to get through. I know what’s coming and I know it can be unpleasant at times, but I also know it will help me get the most intimate fit ever and it’s important to my livelihood.

 

I will keep you posted on social media on how it’s going. Make sure you check out my IG and/or my Facebook page @BAWarrior360 for updates.

 

 

I would tell you to continue to communicate with your prosthetist as your limb matures and when you notice things “happening” with the fit, even minor changes, that you should let them know before you get a blister like mine, or worse!

I am fortunate that I don’t develop infections like some people do, but this one could’ve been bad for a person with a high infection rate.

Be vigilant with your life, your fit, and your comfort. If things don’t feel right, please make sure you reach out to your team.

It’s better to be safe than sorry and laid up for weeks because you “pushed” through something you shouldn’t have.

Also, remember that your limb and your body are constantly changing, no matter how long you’ve been an amputee. Don’t think that you are ___ years out and you won’t see any more changes. I’m almost 6 years out and I’m heading in for a new socket because of fit, not damage to my socket.

Our bodies are always changing and fluctuating, take note, and be vigilant when you notice something look or feel different.

 

I hope you have an amazing week and until next time,

And as always,

B e Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

 

Choose to Shine!

 

Anticipation

Anticipation

 

Let’s discuss Anticipation and Expectations as an amputee.

Every journey is different, every path navigated in life is unique, so why would anyone think that becoming an amputee that we would share the exact same journey?

We will have a similar structure as to what steps come first, second, third, etc, but wWHEN they come, HOW quickly you move from one step to the next, AND when setbacks will happen are all unique to each individual.

Understanding this, and excepting it will help with your success and also your stress.

When we drop the idea that “I want to be doing what Sue is doing.”, or “I want to run like John.” we can embrace our own journey for all its worth, and except the path we are on, which will reduce stressors and help us achieve.

Goal setting and POSITIVE expectations are found to be key to reducing stress and helping us reach success.

Join me for how to go about doing this, and at the end of the podcast check out your Call to Action on what you can be doing right now whether you are awaiting amputation, had an unexpected amputation, or just want to get out of your own way in life so you can find success.

 

Enjoy this episode, share with those you know who need some motivation and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

Much love,

Keep looking up! Reach for the stars, dear Warri0rs!!

 

A Leg Up On Life

A Leg Up On Life

Dealing With Negative Emotions Post-Amputation

 

Anger, Guilt, Shame, and Fear are all such destructive emotions. They hold us back from realizing our full potential and no one is immune to feeling them at one time or another.

As amputees, we face unique challenges, including fears about our new life, future uncertainty, failures, prosthetics, and adapting to physical limitations.

As a wife and homeschooling mom amputee I often struggled with guilt. I was always worried about making mistakes and inadequacy.

Now, as an amputee, (and I ELECTED this), I was even more fearful of what might be my shortcomings.

This is a lot of pressure to put on myself. How about you? Are you adding this stress into your life?

All in all, any of those above mentioned emotions, are taking away your happiness and also adding a negative aspect to your life, one that is stress-inducing and impeding success.

Stress can harm our health, impeding healing and progress. We must recognize and tame these self-destructive emotions if we are to truly love ourselves, love our life and live it fully.

 

Enjoy the good days. Remember those feelings. Harness them and utilize them when you are struggling.

 

We must realize what we are doing to ourselves and how to tame that monster that is self-destructive in nature.

So what can you do when these emotions begin to rear their ugly heads in your mind and life?

 

First thing;

Stop beating yourself up over situations you cannot control. You cannot control infections, poor fitting sockets, blister and rashes, or phantom pains.

Next, you need to communicate with your family and support system about how you are feeling. and when you’re feeling like you are getting everyone down. They need to know where you are at during the harder times as you navigate being an amputee because they probably don’t have any other experience with amputees than YOU.  Help them understand how you see yourself, where you want to be and what’s currently holding you back from realizing your potential. More than likely they wouldn’t want you to be worrying about that, just about getting better and stronger.

Finally, use positive self-talk. Your brain is a powerful muscle and it will bend and move to what thoughts you are allowing it to feed off of. If you tell yourself you aren’t good enough, that you aren’t contributing, or you are letting down those around you, then that is what you will feel is true. BIG TIME STRESSOR!

Time to start forgiving yourself, forgiving those around you that have hurt you, breaking free from fears, and letting go of guilt. When you are sick and laid up, your first priority must be to get stronger and healthier so you CAN get back to your life and family.

You can do this, you are strong enough. This is a long journey, a marathon, not a sprint. You will find that when things are going well something will come along and take you back a step or two. Likewise, when you are struggling, I can promise you, it won’t last and soon everything will start working out for the positive.

Don’t distress, dear Warriors, this too shall pass.

Lift up your chin, put a smile on your face, and laugh despite your struggles.

The time is now to sharpen your mental sword and fight for what you want and how you want to live your life.

Don’t give up and don’t lose hope.

Make today a great day,

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

 

 

 

 

Finding Yourself By Letting Go

Finding Yourself By Letting Go

Through The Eyes of a Horse

Horse Therapy-the horse who started it all: Cherokee

 

What can I say, I LOVE horses! I have always loved horses, just seeing them makes me smile. Yet as a girl growing up in the suburbs of Chicago I was never around any horses. The attraction is a mystery.

Never in my WILDEST dreams could I have imagined that at my age I would be surrounded by them every single day, training them, getting certified to train them, grooming them and now bringing a therapy to the public in which the horses becomes the teacher.

They are incredible creatures with so much to offer.

My journey began after my amputation and with the horse you see pictured above. Even though I was only around him for 30-45 minutes, the impact he made on my life was the most profound experience I have ever felt! Not only did my amputation change the trajectory of my life, now horses were a part of this ever changing path.

Now after 4 years of learning and teaching, observing and making mistakes,  I am ready to bring this mental healing to others, and I AM EXCITED!!!

 

CONNECTION

 

BEING PRESENT

 

TRUST

 

The benefits of just being in proximity to horses is incredible! The healing they can bring to our lives is unmatched.

I hope that one day you, too, can feel the healing power of horses in your life, and I would love to be the one to take you there.

Join me on this new journey that I never, EVER saw coming a mere 5 years ago.

Let’s work together and heal ourselves through the eyes of a horse.

 

I pray you have a beautiful week and a HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

Much Love,

 

My silly girl!
Help!

Help!

How Can You Know What You Don’t Know?

 

Yep, like clockwork!

Like life itself, being an amputee throws you curveball after curveball, no matter how seasoned you are.

My time is now, I guess.

I am almost six years out from my amputation, life has been great! I have been traveling, active, enjoying mobility and no (knock on wood) phantom pains worthy of discussion. This is the good stuff! I’m living my best life!

 

Monday’s walk…pre-pain

Enjoying island life

 

Monday, however, with our weather being nice and cool in the mornings, I took my pups for a walk. About one mile in I noticed an aching in my femur. Never had that before. Very curious.

At  1 1/4 miles, however, I as limping and trying to keep pressure of my limb and socket. Once I got home and sat for a minute the pain was gone, but I could recreate it by moving my socket around.

Now, I know my limits and I know how to push myself so, of course, I went for a walk the next morning.

And you guessed it, I was in pain again, in the same place on my leg. This time I cut my walk a little shorter.

I have never had this before. So I did what I needed to do. I began going through a process of elimination for what I was feeling.

First off, I was checking my residual limb that night for bruising or soreness when I touched the area in question. It feels bruised.

I had no redness or swelling.

I had no rash or blisters.

I checked my weight, only down a few pounds, but that’s not uncommon.

I am noticing some tripping off my toes lately which could indicate that my prothesis might be dropping some when I pick up my leg when walking.

My best guess is that for some odd reason, six years in, I am having some volume change, or shape change, to my residual limb (which is weird since I haven’t changed anything in my routines nor have I been traveling the past couple of weeks). This would explain bruising as I may be banging around in my socket because of excess room.

My worst case scenario is a possible bone spur, which would cause pain on the bone and can happen at anytime after amputation. This would suck because I’d have to have surgery to remove them.

So, for now, I will NOT take to social media to find answers because my medical team and I know my situation best.

I will NOT worry, because that doesn’t help and is a waste of time.

 

The Limb Center: I have these guys in my corner.

 

I have called my prosthetist and let him know what I’m feeling, when I’m feeling it, and where the pain is coming from. I will be seeing him soon to check out my fit of my socket and making some educated guesses with the person who has seen me through to this point.

From there we will formulate a plan to reduce/eliminate  the problem.

 

 

If you are  like me, and are dealing with an unusual circumstance with your residual limb.

If you are feeling scared or worried about what might be causing your trouble, here is your Call to Action:

 

Please don’t ask the keyboard warriors on your social media feed!

Please process what you are seeing, feeling, and noticing that is different than before with your residual limb and/or socket.

Make notes.

Call your medical team: orthopedic surgeon, prosthetist, and/or physical therapist and get their help.

And please, whatever you do, don’t waste time worrying about what it could be. Just remember that you were strong enough to get to where you are now, and you will be stronger still as you navigate this (what may be your first of MANY issues as an amputee) hurdle.

Remember to breathe, step back from your situation, make logical observations and talk to your medical team.

You and I will get through this.

We are warriors, of course.

Attitude is Everything

Have a beautiful week and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

Much love,

 

 

 

Enjoying Life

Enjoying Life

Live in the Moment and Experience Your Best Life

 

 

Take a breathe. Now slowly let it out.

Breathing is an automatic response by our body, it knows that we can’t survive without oxygen, but have you ever noticed your breathe being shallow or worse yet, you held your breathe?

We tend to do this in times of stress, anxiety and fear, and yes, we all face some sort of and some level of these moments on a daily basis.

We are actually depriving ourselves of the one thing our body needs to stay alive!

Now, take that and add in the frustration, pain, and uncertainty of losing a limb and trying to “get back to your life”. Also add in, for some of you, the anger you feel if accident or sickness took your limb away and the choice of living a life as an amputee wasn’t up to you. That’s pretty harsh, right?

But, we are stronger than we know. Our bodies and our minds are more resilient than we understand.

We must really make the effort to push forward.

 

 

I named this podcast Be-YOU-tiful Adaptive Warrior because 1) I believe we all have a warrior spirit, 2) that we are beautiful just as we are (no matter how many limbs we have) and 3) we are adaptive beings, no matter what is thrown at us, we are capable of adaptation.

The time is now to live in the moment. Realize that you and your life, no matter what you’re going through, are a miracle and capable of great things.

 

 

Now is the time to enjoy your life and press onward and FORWARD! No use in looking back if it’s just going to cause you pain, stress, and frustration. What’s done is done.

Now we live.

Now we rise up.

Now we embrace our journey, set goals, crush goals and REPEAT!!

You are special and you are strong enough! So rise up, Warriors, and live your best life!

 

Now what?

Ask yourself, “AM I ready to live my life again?”

If the answer is “No”, what is holding you back? You need to address those issues first, just don’t let fear be the reason. We all live with certain fears, the difference: those that press through their fears find the reward of facing them by experiencing a full life.

If your answer is “Yes, I’m ready”, then your next step is to decide what it is that you want to do, where you want to go, what you want to see, and what you want to try.

Make a list.

Decide which ones are plausible now and start creating steps you need to reach that goal and then….

BEGIN TODAY!!

If you want to surf, then you need to build core strength, work on balance, get a surf leg, practice popups on your floor in your house, etc, etc, etc.

Every goals has steps to get to the goal. Break yours down into bite sized pieces and start getting after it.

Remember, you are a miracle, your life is a miracle.

Be present, and enjoy your life. You’ll be so glad you did!!

Write to me and tell me how it’s going, I’d love to hear from you!

And remember you are a Warrior!

Until next week,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

 

Prepping For Battle

Prepping For Battle

Finding Peace and Comfort in This Hard Season

 

How does a warrior prepare for battle?

They need the right kind of armor to protect themself from harm.

They need weapons to defeat the enemy, too.

 

What is your armor?

What weapons do you wield as you go into this new season, this battle, for your health and livelihood?

Yes, you CAN prepare. There are things you can do to build yourself up to being stronger and able to handle the journey you are embarking on.

I am speaking from a perspective that I relate to, that is, elected amputation. Not everyone has this experience, and I cannot even begin to imagine what it must be like to have that taken from me with no choice, so I will not be speaking of that journey today.

I had four months to prepare, research, interview, seek help, and get a leg up (PUN intended!) on my forthcoming surgery.

I believe there are many things we need to address to feel even somewhat prepared for such a huge life-changing surgery, and even then, you are never going to be completely ready for that day and what is to come in the years to follow, but you might as well start from a positive, strong place.

I address 4 major areas to get yourself prepped for such a surgery: Mental, Emotional, Physical, and Insurance

Yep, Insurance! You are in control of those other areas of your life, but insurance can become the enemy very quickly if you are not researching and doing your due diligence with what your insurance covers…prosthetics are EXPENSIVE!!!

Like I said before, I had four months from the time I scheduled my surgery til the day of my amputation.

These four months were extremely challenging and emotional. I tried my best to stay positive and convinced that this was the right move, but some days were much harder to convince myself than others.

I began to go through the “What if’s….” A LOT! I had fears well up in the night as I lay in the dark and everyone else in my house was sleeping. I struggled with the idea of death, and I worried that I wouldn’t be a functioning amputee. So many questions, and I knew NO amputees at the time. So many fears and so many uncertainties. It was almost unbearable.

But I decided to not let negativity rule my months I had left as a ‘two-legger’, and I began to prepare my heart, mind and body for the battle ahead. And Insurance, unbeknownst to me, was going to be a very grueling battle!

Don’t get caught without a plan.

Don’t get caught without visualizing a better future.

Don’t get caught without setting goals.

These items are your armor and your weapons.

Be prepared, you are, after all, a WARRIOR!

We all have a warrior spirit, some of us just need to believe it to unleash it.

Believe in yourself. You can do this! I believe in YOU, Dear Warrior!

 

 

Start making a plan now, don’t wait!

Prepare yourself by addressing your mental and emotional capacity to handle what’s coming. How? Talk to people. When you talk about it you will find you relax the hold it has over you. I remember when I couldn’t even say “Amputation”, it made it too real if I said it, but that’s what I had to learn to do. The more I talked about it, the easier it became to say, eventually it got me then thinking about what was coming and how I might handle certain situations, like getting in and out of a car, going to the bathroom in the middle of the night, cooking dinner while on crutches, etc. I would not have those questions without open conversations with my family and friends.

Physically prepare by building your balance, core strength, and the limb that will be left behind to do all the work.

Finally, insurance. Please do your research. Ask questions about what is and is NOT covered by your insurance. Double check, and even triple check if time allows. The cost is profound, and the average household struggles to afford one.

You are strong enough to go through this, but you must prepare, just as a runner prepares for a marathoner and a warrior prepares for battle. Strengthen yourself and watch a new life unfold in front of you.

Your life is ending or diminished because of amputation, it has just turned onto a new path. And the adventures will be amazing!

So, Warriors, rise up to the challenge in front of you! You are strong enough. You are brave enough. You are ENOUGH!

Until next week and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

 

 

 

Independence

Independence

Freedom and Joy in Movement

 

What do you dream about doing or accomplishing?

As amputees we tend to struggle with getting back out there, worried that we won’t be able to live full lives filled with goals set and conquered, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth!

Yes, the first couple of years there is a lot of changes taking place with your body, and a whole new routine of being fitted for your prosthesis every few months, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be getting active and finding the joy of becoming independent once again.

Prior to my amputation I spent 5 years in surgeries, icing and elevating my leg, and going to appointments. I had no time to do anything else, and my life became a series of tasks in hopes of getting better, but not truly living. I had no time to dream about the next ski trip or learning a new sport, I was in survival mode, plain and simple.

However, I set many goals for myself to accomplish by one year post-amputation. I never thought, “What if I can’t do this?” or “That’s not possible.” I just set my goals and worked toward them. No one told me that maybe I was being to aggressive on myself, or that I was dreaming too big. My family and friends just walked alongside of me, supporting me through it all.

What I can tell you about that first year is this: I was so happy! I found joy in life once again! I never looked back with regrets to having had the amputation, and in that first year I knew that I could do anything I put my mind to.

 

Life is meant to be lived fully. I aim to try new things whenever the opportunity arises!

 

The point: We each are traveling on our own unique journey, but we all want to have independence and the feeling of freedom that comes with that, this truly goes for those of us who have been laid up, or stuck in a medical crisis. Setting goals to keep us on track and moving forward is key to feeling the freedom of independence once again.

When I speak to other amputees about what they want to get back to doing to make them feel productive, and independent in life, some of the most basic life skills is what they speak of first; dressing themselves, standing in their kitchen to wash dishes or make a meal. Basic, right? But that’s what makes us feel productive and useful. I know I couldn’t wait to show my family that I could serve them the way I use to, before the accident. And when we experience these baby steps of accomplishment it leaves us thirsting for more!

The goals and aspirations grow and change. As we build strength and stamina, as we get better at using our prosthesis, we begin to really dream of the possibilities. That’s when the real fun begins, and the joy from accomplishing goals becomes a need not just a want.

So, What do you dream about accomplishing? What will give you back your independence or freedom?

Dare to dream because being an amputee isn’t what it use to be. You can do anything you put your mind to, if only you dare!

 

This week I want you to make a list of the things you most want to do. Maybe tasks around the house or at work. Maybe just getting dressed or making the bed. It doesn’t have to be big, monumental tasks or goals, just ones that will make you feel good that you can do on your own again.

It is also ok to add, to your list, goals for the future. Remember, dreaming is what keeps us motivated and moving forward.

Don’t be afraid to add whatever is on your heart. This is a great time to not think about the “how” of these longterm goals, just dream!

Finding independence again, is such a blessing and brings great joy.

Just remember to START WHERE YOU’RE AT.

Know that with these new goals there may be some fear or anxiety, but with anything worth achieving we must all face fears. I do all the time. Just remember what you’re made of. Remember what you’ve been through. YOU ARE A WARRIOR!!

Now make that list and start tackling those dreams!

 

I hope you all have a blessed week, thank you for listening,

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

Much love,

 

Bunker Hill- 297 steps to the top! I was nervous but I did it!
Times of Struggles

Times of Struggles

Finding Peace in These Moments

 

These are the times I struggle with the most. Yes, it can be nice to have down time but for someone like me downtime can become a bad habit and turn, quickly, into a new way of living.

I realize how hard I push myself, daily. I know I pack my schedule full, every single day. If I don’t keep that pace I truly become an all or nothing kind of person.

Well, I am being tested on my drive and motivation right now. I have been away on vacation, followed by a week+ of being sick, into prepping for my son to head back to college, to hurting my back! These past 3 weeks have been a call, from my body, to slow down and recharge my batteries, and I am trying to listen.

I have guilt for not being there for my horses, and feel uncomfortable in my body for the lack of gym time and hiking.

I know that this is a moment for me to work on my internal self, my self-talk, and my motivation to get back on the horse once I feel better, but it is tough!

When we get to a place of being so super active and it turns to a lot of downtime, it can be hard to feel mentally and emotionally good about ourselves. I know I am always trying to do what I feel I “should” be doing as a mom and wife, but when I am hurting, physically, it makes it hard to be active, and in a good headspace.

Here’s what I have been doing to make the best of my time:

I am cooking for my family,

I am reading my Bible again,

I am reading for pleasure,

I have been writing in a goal setting journal for the gym and food aspect of my life,

I am creating gift ideas for family and friends,

I am planning my seasonal parties,

I am active, in my head, at least.

As for my body, well, that is going to take time with a back that is hurting.

It’s amazing that everything I want to do to be, even somewhat, active takes back strength and control! I tried using my surf board in the pool and the arching of my back on it almost paralyzed me! Sit ups or planks? Forget it, back control. Lifting? No way, my back is always engaged with weights. Walking? I know I am not walking correctly (over compensating for the pain), so I will only create more issues.  This is tough, I won’t lie. But I have seen this before, I have heard from many of you, and what I see is a moment we are given to learn about ourselves, a time to recharge our batteries for something more coming up, a situation that allows us time to regroup and goal set for our future, especially if our future feels uncertain and scary.

This is a time for us to use for the good. Use it to get to know yourself or to realign your life with new goals, hopes or dreams.

Maybe you have felt overwhelmed and unsure of what you are suppose to be doing right now, use this down time as a chance to gain clarity and focus.

You are a warrior, don’t you ever forget that!

I believe in you! Do you?

 

This week, allow yourself the moments you have being laid up to being constructive for your future. You are not being lazy, you are healing your body, you are listening to what your body needs right now. This moment isn’t forever.

Use this time to dream, goal set, find focus, change directions, plan.

What do you want from your life?

What have you been missing out on since you got “laid up”?

You can use this time for positive gains, just in a different way than you thought. You may not be on your feet at this moment, or unable to perform certain tasks right now, but prepare yourself for when your body is ready to get back at it. It’ll be here before you know it!

 

So Rise up, faithful Warrior, and chase your dreams!!

Until next time and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

 

Walk It Out

Walk It Out

Practice Makes Permanence

It was 1 year post-amputation before I felt confident enough to go out and try a 10K

 

Let’s cut to the nitty gritty.

Practice makes permanence not perfection.

As an amputee it takes daily, mindful practice placing one step in front of the other to get comfortable in your prosthesis.

To take time to practice what feels right and looks right is important to learning the proper gait which in turn will help keep the rest of your body healthy and stronger for the long run.

If you start getting lazy, or not taking breaks and pushing yourself too hard too fast you might find yourself getting tired and losing focus and control over your practice.

This is a journey, not an end game. I am still focused on my gait and I am almost 6 years post-amputation.

Hiking on uneven, rocky terrain takes a lot of practice!

 

See the waddle? I can tell I was being lazy or I was hurting based on this one snapshot.

 

Woah! Working on balance and leg strength is important everyday so you can go off roading!

 

And once again, I try to challenge myself on different terrain. Winter hiking boots on snow/ice! Quite the trek!

 

 

Be mindful as you work on walking.

Pay attention to your hips being engaged and swinging your legs through your step versus swinging it out and around.

Take your steps slow and be patient.

Walk wherever you can and make learning your prosthesis a full time job, it’s important!

Also, be mindful of when you’re getting tired and take a break so you don’t resort to bad posture and gait.

I know you can do it, remember it is a journey and one worth practicing al the time.

Rise up, Warriors, and get to steppin’!

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Me and My Guys in Hollywood Studios, FL